Overview of Giving Verbs
Japanese has three main verbs for "giving," chosen based on the recipient's social status:
| Verb | Level | Used When |
|---|---|---|
| あげる | Neutral | Giving to equals/juniors |
| やる | Casual/Humble | Giving to juniors/plants/animals |
| さしあげる | Honorific | Giving to superiors |
友達にプレゼントをあげた
"I gave a present to my friend"
先生に本をさしあげました
"I gave a book to my teacher"
あげる - Neutral Giving
Basic Pattern
Giver + は + Recipient + に + Object + を + あげる
私は友達にプレゼントをあげた
"I gave a present to my friend"
姉が弟にお金をあげました
"My older sister gave money to my younger brother"
彼女に花をあげるつもりです
"I plan to give her flowers"
When to Use あげる
1. You give to friends/equals
友達にCDをあげた
"I gave a CD to my friend"
2. Family members give to each other (equals)
妹にバッグをあげました
"I gave a bag to my younger sister"
3. Giving to juniors/younger people
後輩に本をあげた
"I gave a book to my junior"
4. Third person gives to another third person
田中さんは山田さんに時計をあげた
"Tanaka gave a watch to Yamada"
やる - Casual/Humble Giving
When to Use やる
1. Giving to plants
花に水をやる
"Water the flowers" (give water to flowers)
植物に肥料をやった
"I gave fertilizer to the plants"
2. Giving to animals
犬にえさをやる
"Feed the dog" (give food to dog)
猫にミルクをやった
"I gave milk to the cat"
3. Very casual speech to close juniors (rough/masculine)
弟に小遣いをやった
"I gave pocket money to my brother" (casual/rough)
Note: Can sound condescending. あげる is safer!
4. Humble expression in formal situations
お手伝いしてやりましょう
"Let me help you" (humble)
さしあげる - Honorific Giving
When to Use さしあげる
1. Giving to superiors
先生にお土産をさしあげました
"I gave a souvenir to my teacher"
社長にレポートをさしあげます
"I'll give the report to the president"
2. Giving to customers/clients
お客様に資料をさしあげます
"I'll give materials to the customer"
3. Showing respect
おばあさんにプレゼントをさしあげた
"I gave a present to my grandmother"
Particle Usage
に - Recipient Marker
友達に本をあげた
"I gave a book to my friend"
先生にお土産をさしあげました
"I gave a souvenir to my teacher"
を - Object Marker
彼にプレゼントをあげた
"I gave him a present"
Third Person Perspective
When talking about others giving:
田中さんは山田さんに本をあげた
"Tanaka gave a book to Yamada"
先生は学生に賞をさしあげた
"The teacher gave an award to the student"
兄が友達にゲームをやった
"My brother gave a game to his friend" (casual)
Common Patterns
Past Tense
あげた - gave (neutral)
やった - gave (casual)
さしあげた - gave (honorific)
Negative
あげない - won't give
やらない - won't give
さしあげない - won't give
Te-form (doing for someone)
手伝ってあげる
"I'll help you" (do the favor of helping)
教えてあげた
"I taught (them)"
作ってさしあげます
"I'll make it (for you)" (honorific)
Giving Actions (〜てあげる)
Pattern: Verb-て + あげる/やる/さしあげる
This means "do something FOR someone":
友達を手伝ってあげた
"I helped my friend"
妹に本を読んであげる
"I'll read a book to my younger sister"
先生に説明してさしあげました
"I explained to the teacher"
Common Conversations
Example 1: Birthday Gift
A: 誕生日に何をあげましたか？
"What did you give for their birthday?"
B: 本をあげました
"I gave a book"
A: 喜んでくれましたか？
"Were they happy?"
B: はい、とても喜んでくれました
"Yes, very happy"
Example 2: To a Teacher
A: 先生に何をさしあげますか？
"What will you give to the teacher?"
B: お花をさしあげようと思います
"I'm thinking of giving flowers"
A: いいですね
"That's nice"
Example 3: Helping a Friend
A: 手伝ってあげようか？
"Shall I help you?"
B: ありがとう！助かります
"Thanks! That helps"
Politeness Levels
Casual
あげる
やる (very casual)
Polite
あげます
やります
Honorific
さしあげる
さしあげます
Common Mistakes
Mistake 1: Using やる for people (sounds rude)
Wrong: 友達にやった ❌ (sounds condescending)
Right: 友達にあげた ✓
"I gave to my friend"
Mistake 2: Using あげる to superiors
Unnatural: 先生に本をあげました ⚠️
Better: 先生に本をさしあげました ✓
"I gave a book to my teacher"
Mistake 3: Wrong particle
Wrong: 友達をプレゼントをあげた ❌
Right: 友達にプレゼントをあげた ✓
"I gave a present to my friend"
Mistake 4: Using when you're the receiver
Wrong: 私は友達にプレゼントをあげられた ❌
Right: 私は友達にプレゼントをもらった ✓
"I received a present from my friend"
Comparison Chart
| Recipient | Verb | Example |
|---|---|---|
| Equal/Friend | あげる | 友達にあげた |
| Junior/Younger | あげる/やる | 弟にあげた |
| Superior | さしあげる | 先生にさしあげた |
| Plant | やる | 花に水をやる |
| Animal | やる | 犬にえさをやる |
Special Expressions
〜てあげる (offer to do something)
手伝ってあげようか？
"Shall I help you?"
教えてあげる
"I'll teach you"
作ってあげるよ
"I'll make it for you"
Warning: Can sound condescending if overused!
Present for future giving
プレゼントをあげるつもりです
"I intend to give a present"
明日あげます
"I'll give it tomorrow"
Context Matters
Within family
To younger siblings: あげる or やる
To older siblings: あげる
To parents: さしあげる (very polite) or あげる
At work
To colleagues (equal): あげる
To boss/seniors: さしあげる
To juniors: あげる
To strangers
Use あげる (neutral and safe)
Use さしあげる if they're clearly older/higher status
Practice Sentences
Basic
友達にCDをあげました
"I gave a CD to my friend"
花に水をやります
"I water the flowers"
先生に手紙をさしあげた
"I gave a letter to my teacher"
Intermediate
誕生日に妹にネックレスをあげるつもりです
"I plan to give my sister a necklace for her birthday"
毎日犬にえさをやっています
"I feed my dog every day"
部長にレポートをさしあげなければなりません
"I must give the report to the department head"
Advanced
友達が困っていたので、お金を貸してあげました
"My friend was in trouble, so I lent them money"
この資料をお客様にさしあげてください
"Please give these materials to the customer"
彼は弟におもちゃを買ってやった
"He bought a toy for his younger brother"
Related Grammar Points
- Receiving: もらう/いただく - Getting from others
- Favor: くれる/くださる - Others giving to you
- Direction of Actions - Perspective in giving
- てあげる/てくれる/てもらう - Doing favors
- Benefactive expressions - Helping/favoring
- Honorific language - Politeness levels